Hear Me Out...The most entertaining bad coach in all the land

During my fall sports postseason break, I was tempted to write about Oakland Raiders coach Jon Gruden. I was patient though because let's be honest, this is Jon Gruden and he's going to, at minimum, say one dumb thing a week. And he didn't disappoint this week.

The Raiders play the AFC's second-best team, the L.A. Chargers, this week. The last time the AFC West rivals matched up, the Chargers dominated the Raiders 26-10, in that soccer stadium in Carson, Calif. Getting ready for LA this week Gruden was asked about the prep for the Chargers and this is what he had to say.

"We liked what we did the last time. Obviously, they had a couple of big plays offensively," Gruden continued. "They were able to sustain drives. I think we only had three possessions in the entire second half. Obviously a bad call by me on first-and-goal at the 1 [-yard line]. We had two false starts on third-and-2. We had a false start on first-and-goal at the 5. We had some critical errors that are inexcusable that really hurt us, but we competed hard. We played some good football against the Chargers."

I love this quote for so, so, so many reasons, and probably could spend at least 700 words on it, yet, I'll spare you. Instead, I'll touch on two highlights. Highlight No. 1, if Gruden were coaching a high school team or even a lower end Division I football program, this quote would be fine, but he's not. He's the head coach of a professional football team in the best football league in the world. If you're going for moral victories in the pro ranks you need to aim higher, not "At least the men played hard." They're professionals playing hard isn't optional.

Highlight No. 2, and my personal favorite, after saying he liked what they did, Gruden runs through the reasons why they were so bad against the Chargers. He makes it sound like they were only a few plays away from victory. I remember this game and it was not close, the Chargers could have dropped 40 had they not taken their foot off the gas.

I know it seems like I dislike Gruden, I don't. Quite the opposite, I absolutely love Jon Gruden, as a football coach. (He's still the worst color analyst of the modern NFL area, although Jeff Fisher is giving him a run for that title) There are plenty of bad coaches across the major sports leagues but most of them are boring, like Cowboys coach Jason Garrett or Chicago Bulls Coach Fred Hoiberg. (I thought Hoiberg was going to be a good coach, I was very, very wrong)

Gruden is that rare combo of bad coach plus eccentric personality with no shame. That's what makes him so enjoyable, well, enjoyable for non-Raiders fans. This season has probably been hell for Raiders fans and I'm sure it doesn't help to remember that Gruden has nine more years on a 10-year deal. Sure he could get fired, but after owner Mark Davis dropped all that money on relocating to Las Vegas, it's unlikely.

Normally, I'd offer some kind of condolences to a tortured fan base but Raiders fans deserve every ounce of this pain. You were way too cocky coming into this season and you brought this on yourself, enjoy the next nine Gruden-led seasons!

Gruden has made two seasons worth of questionable roster moves within the first 10 weeks of this NFL season.

The Khali Mack trade was a bad trade for the Raiders because if Gruden doesn't select Hall of Fame talent with those two first-round picks, it will end up as the worst trade of this century. Obviously, the trade created added pressure but what added the most pressure was Gruden's mouth. Because, as Mack was racking up sacks and forced fumbles in Chicago, the Raiders D couldn't put pressure on any opposing QB. This led to Gruden complaining and saying out loud how tough it was to find a pass-rusher and not realizing that Mack was so good.

From time to time Gruden sort of admits he messed up by trading Mack but like some of our "greatest leaders" in D.C., he'll realize he's about to concede defeat. So he reverses course by doubling down and unloading the blame elsewhere.

Accountability has never been a strong suit for Gruden and he's already blamed his GM for giving him this roster, a roster he said he loved during the offseason but that's not important. The excuses are only going to get funnier as the Ls pile up.

Personally, I can't wait until he blames his QB, - no, not Derek Carr he's not long for the Silver and Black – but the next QB he drafts, trades for and/or signs. He was awesome at this during his time in Tampa, when week to week he was either in love with or hated Brad Johnson, Shaun King, Jeff Garcia, Luke McCown, Brian Griese, Bruce Gradkowski and Chris Simms

I will give Gruden kudos for trading Amari Cooper for a first-round pick because that's a steal and great move. It's a shame we all don't have a delusional Jerry Jones in our life to bail us out.

There are plenty of Gruden Blunders to pick from but I'm going to talk about one more before wrapping this up. Last week he was talking with Fox Sports and Raiders legend Howie Long about the rough start. Eventually, he turned into a jilted lover and overcompensated by saying almost the whole league wants to suit up in the Silver and Black.

"I get a lot of phone calls from people that are dying to come play here. I'm just telling you. They're dying to play for the Raiders," Gruden told [Fox Sports Howie] Long. "And to have salary-cap space and to have a chance to talk to the people that you really want to wear the silver and black, the guys you really want to wear the silver and black and represent this team, that's exciting."

The only reason free agents will want to play for the Raiders is their salary cap space. As of writing, spotrac.com is projecting them to have around $79.6 million in available cap space. That ranks them fifth for '19 behind Cleveland ($81.3 million), Buffalo ($90.8 million), NY Jets ($106.6 million) and Indy ($125.4 million).

No free agent is signing on to be a Raider because of Gruden (there's plenty of talk going around that he's already lost the locker room) or that they'll get to play in a college stadium in Vegas next year. It's 100 percent because of the $$$, and after this awful season, Gruden is going to be desperate to make a splash. He's guaranteed to ink at least four free agents to albatross deals.

As Gruden's thumbprint on this roster grows he's going to become even crazier and more unpredictable. At some point over the next nine seasons, I wouldn't be shocked if he traded a fan favorite player just out of spite toward the Raiders fan base. And in his press conference, he'll say something along the lines of "You fans brought this on yourself, you left me no choice." And while I'll be cackling like a madman, he'll be right. You brought this on yourself Raiders fans.