Do you hate?

What things do you hate? What people do you hate?

One mild definition of hate is “intense dislike” and I think that’s what we use the word as when we say we hate broccoli or hate spiders.

Perhaps hate is thrown around too much and we just don’t see hate as it really is, “intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger or sense of injury,” per Meriam Webster. I feel that is the most accurate definition of hate.

I remember growing up and when we would use the word hate my mother would suggest that we didn’t hate broccoli and if we ever used the word hate in discussing another person she would talk about hate and what that really meant to “hate” someone.

While I remember part of that as an adult and I don’t say the word hate in relation to any person I have said I hate spiders but as I write this I realize I myself need to be more careful throwing that word around.

Why bring up hate you ask?

A quick glance of the headlines in the past few weeks should give you a clue or scroll through social media and the hate oozes out of many posts and memes. The hate comes from all sides, right or left, Republican or Democrat, from people of all sizes, races and religion.

It appears in today’s world that hate is one of the few things that is all inclusive, unfortunately. There is a lot of hate out there.

My husband sent a link to an article Monday night shaking his head and asking, “where is all this hate coming from?”

I wish I knew, because in knowing where it comes from, perhaps we find a way to turn hate into love.

So, what was the link? This particular one was to a news article about a Nevada man charged with making threats to a federal official, specifically antisemitic, hate-filled threats toward Jewish Senator Jacky Rosen (D-Nevada). I am not going to repeat the threats here, suffice to say they were vile, angry, definitely threatening and plain hateful.

The story brought to mind the news from a few weeks ago about the Chicago landlord who stabbed a 6-year-old Palestinian American boy 26 times killing him. He also stabbed the boy’s mother more than a dozen times. She survived.

As if there was not enough things creating hate in the world, the war between Israel and the terror group Hamas has brought hate even moreso to the forefront.

So what can be done? Well, I hate to do a song reference but in the words of Michael Jackson I believe we all must first start with the “man in the mirror.”

We must start thinking about how we feel and how we express those feelings. People, especially children, are watching.

What things do you hate. When you are angry at someone do you say you hate them. I remember as a child I would yell at my sister and brother that I hated them and as soon as those words were out I regretted them and I would go and apologize and tell them I didn’t mean it.

But the words were out there. (Words, another time and another space for that topic.)

I will be more careful. I do not like the taste of broccoli and I do not like spiders. You make think these are little things but that’s where it starts. Hateful feelings start small and grow.

When I think about it have to honestly say, thankfully, I am not sure there is anything I hate or have “intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger or sense of injury” toward.

So first, we examine ourselves and if there is something you hate, find out why and try to change your attitude toward that thing or person. (I will be the first to admit from experience that prayer can change your attitude toward a person, just know God does not wave a magic wand, He brings you through things and opens your eyes to things that change your mind.)

Second, think and consider how your thoughts or speech are influencing others? Are they feeling them with a sense of hate or love? Are they encouraging or discouraging?

Third, speak up if you hear someone speaking or acting out of hate toward a thing, an animal or a person, even if it is an entire group of people.

We must not wait or expect governments to do this for us. Only when we take a stand and say enough, stop the hate, will we begin to make a difference.

It starts with you and I.