PROSPER suicide prevention meeting Q&A

Following presentations by psychiatrist Kent Corso and Marine Corps veteran/suicide attempt survivor Shawn Moore, the PROSPER (Proactive Reduction Of Suicides in Populations via Evidence-based Research) meeting held on Nov. 14 opened to questions from the audience.

To open, Megan McCoy told Moore, “I appreciate you sharing your story; I know that’s not easy. I try to share my story about recovering from drug addiction, reliving those moments and those difficult times, and it doesn’t seem to get easier, no matter how many times I do it. So thank you.”

Before McCoy, Moore had just finished sharing his story; how two traumatic brain injuries lead to Moore’s early retirement from the Marine Corps, how feeling isolated and abusing alcohol led him to attempt suicide, and how he has used those experiences as a platform to raise awareness in suicide prevention efforts.

McCoy asked Moore if it has gotten any easier for him to share his story?

He said, “I gotta say, the more I share my story the more I feel like I am doing what I have always wanted to do; to help those who are helpless. The more I share my story, the more it brings down those walls for me and I can have an open dialogue. And thank you for your work in sharing your path to recovery.”

Some conversation followed, which Corso guided for Moore to give some insight into a conversation he had with his grandfather over the phone an hour before his suicide attempt. During this conversation Moore’s grandfather could tell that Moore sounded unhappy, and he asked Moore, “What’s wrong?” Moore responded that everything was fine. Corso asked Moore if he would have answered honestly if his grandfather had asked a more direct question, such as, “Are you thinking about suicide?”

Moore said, “In the example of my situation, I guess I was looking for that deeper question. I think I would have told him that the thunderstorm that day had put me in a weird funk, and I would have told him about my predicament. It was hard because it was just over the phone, and I didn’t want to worry my family. I had a negative mantra at that time; I didn’t want my burden to be a burden on others. I felt like nobody cared.”

Corso then asked, “What were some helpful things people have said since your attempt?”

Moore said, “I remember dwelling on the fact that I couldn’t complete one military contract; it was for four years, and I had to leave at two. My buddy told me, ‘It doesn’t matter if you serve one year or 20 years. What matters is the fact that you were willing to sign that contract. You gave your life for something bigger than yourself.’”

He continued, “You’re your own worst critic. It’s easy to see all your flaws, and overlook the barriers you’ve overcome and the milestones you’ve achieved.”

Washakie County Sheriff Austin Brookwell asked Moore, “Do you think that hearing these positive things about yourself, for you to look at what you have achieved, would hearing those things before your attempt have changed the outcome?”

Moore said, “I bought into this saying about former military that stuck with me when I retired; that we are waiting in line to die. I think hearing those positive things would have given me more hope, and allow me to see myself in a different light, and then I would’ve seen all the good that the VA [Veterans Affairs] does for people like me.”

Worland High School student Isabel Accurso asked the last question, saying, “Next month will be the one-year anniversary of my classmate [Tyson Hoopes] [dying by] suicide. Do you have any advice on how I can offer support to my friends?”

Corso fielded the question, saying, “Grieving a suicide can be difficult. If someone dies in a car crash, it’s second nature to comfort those who were close to them. But when it’s suicide, we hesitate to check on them. You have to figure out who else is in the same boat, who else is grieving, and come together to memorialize and celebrate the life of the person who was lost. We’re not glamorizing that they killed themselves; we’re celebrating all the good things that they were and who they were as a person. How could one unhelpful decision undo all the great things that person is? We can’t write their whole narrative, their whole life story around that one decision when they were in a moment of helplessness and desperation.

“We have to celebrate the good parts of them, and kind of honor them and the relationship we had with them in whatever way feels right.”

The meeting ended with a reminder to reach out to those who are struggling, and listing resources for those in Wyoming struggling with thoughts of suicide, such as the 988 suicide and crisis lifeline. Those in need or a loved one can call to speak to a crisis counselor who can advise you on local resources. Calling 988 does not mean you will be taken to the hospital, and they don’t need any personal information; call 988 to get the help you need.

The Nov. 14 PROSPER meeting is the beginning of a two-year suicide prevention initiative campaign in Washakie County. Northern Wyoming News will continue to report on PROSPER as meetings take place.